Look At These Trees


Often I find, when I’m approaching a field as a novice, I want too much too soon. I want to look at trees when I don’t yet comprehend the forrest. Our Net (Google, Wiki etc) encourages this. It’s easy as hell to look at trees: Find factoids, opinions, etc. The hard work is in seeing the forest. Is in simplification. Condensing (It’s a poem).


Finally, keys and whitespace again. Finally, the rules and regulation of english grammar, funneling their way through my brainpain and into these ten fingers. Finally, the tradition of my race, its culture, its collected best practices which are in fact collected by no-one but are our vocal melange – the all inclusive English collection. It includes American History Part 4 The Legacy of the Monroe Doctrine and it includes Pynchon and it includes the wildest shithouse porn. Its rules can be prescriptive or proscriptive, but they’re always laid out firmly, with grave predictions for the wayward, though with a courtroom wink and a banker’s nod we understand them to be quite malleable.

Finally, caffeine again. Finally, the hiss and fuss of a machine being tuned. Finally, the blast of caff which brings with it the electric rush of ideas. I love anything that brings us up, and maybe it’s caff that I love best. It’s such a loving up, such a brute but also familial jolt – like rough sex with a long-term lover. There’s is no other upper that will stick around when the deed is done, will lick your wounds, will straighten your shirt, tie your tie and then send you out into the world not only fit for battle, but better off than when you found her.


it’s always the one you love

French pastry guy at the Hillcrest Farmer’s Market – the one at the stand with the yummy olives and the feta – thought I’d try his ham & cheese croissants. Took them home and heated them up – Not enough heat to kill whatever meanie was in there. Jen got it a little – nausea all day sunday – I got nuked. Puking and fever and puking and puking on Sunday. Liquid diet Monday and Tuesday. Finally, today, a foray back to solid foods – crackers, rice, cookies. Flavorless calories. Still really weak. Haven’t written since Saturday. Been going to work because I’m a glutton for punishment? Yup, must be it.